Thursday, January 7, 2010

I think I live in the Land of Loonies...

First off taking care of a Granny with dementia entails answering questions like, "will it be dark until it is light?", helping her when she gets stuck in public restroom stalls, having to deal with her when she gets angry when she doesn't have beer and chips, telling her I am her granddaughter every other day, listening to the same stories over and over again, and what not.

But what really worries me:

The other night started off okay. Kiah received a gift certificate to Baskin Robbins for graduating out of reading lab. He was happy to skip karate to go get ice cream. I was happy to skip karate and not have to sit in uncomfortable chairs listening to kids yell at the top of their lungs, yet, reluctant to go to ice cream - I mean come on - I just started a diet. I was proud of myself for picking the kid's size vanilla pomagranite probiotic frozen yogurt. So I figured why not go to Trader Joes to pick up some good healthy food to reward myself. Kiah was being his usual crazy self: squirreling around, hopping on the cart, all while holding his double scoop ice cream cone. I kept telling him to stop, and in what seemed like slow motion his ice cream flew up, somersaulted and landed face down in the cart. Of course he starts trippin'. After telling him told you so, I instructed him to take it out to the garbage and use the napkin to wipe the top of it off so he could eat the rest. He looked at me like, "What?" So I repeated my self again - "What?" So I slowly broke down the steps pointed everything out and figured he had it. Went and got the cart and came back. I started shopping and he asked, "Are you sure I can eat it?", "Yes". "Are you sure I can eat it?", " Yes, you wiped it off right? , okay then. " He takes a big bite then says, " I didn't know I can eat ice cream after wiping it on a garbage can." OH MY GOD!!! Now I am trippin'. Chris walks up and I start telling him and freaking out. I asked him, " Can you take him ... take him to get a drink of water." He looks at me like, "What." "Chris, can you take him to get a drink of water?" - "What?" By that time I was almost in shock by the absentmindedness of my boys -I mean what in the hell? Why would my son even think that I would say to wipe it off on the garbage and Chris, hello!, he ate garbage practically. He got his drink, I gave him my frozen yogurt and thanked God for probiotics.

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