Opinions and feelings......

A lot of art marketing workshops and books I have read; stressed the importance of not mixing business with personal life on your blog.  But my life and art are so tightly entwined I can't help it.  It's just the way it is.  I don't know why I wanted to make a note of that here.  Maybe it's because my balance has been off lately.  Where there is no time for business and no time for family.  There seems to be a missing part of the equation and I think procrastination and defeat have to do with it.  There are so many things on my to do list I get inundated just looking at it.  I have been getting some things done, but they are just menial little things.  Not the big life dreams I have been carrying around for so long.  Scheduling has always been difficult for me.  I feel so defeated when things get in the way of it.  So now I have a why bother mentality.

How do you balance your personal life with business to make it all happen?  Any secrets you would be willing to share?  How do you feel about having a blog for business and family?  Should people keep separate blogs?

Hope you all have a magnificent weekend!!!

I am sorry.......

It has been very hard for me to get back in the swing of back to school things.  Kiah has been having trouble staying focused.  This caused a lot of problems last year.  I thought we had it pretty much controlled by the end of the school year.  The doctor said if he did have ADD it was a slight case and he didn't need medication.  The school said he didn't qualify for any support because his IQ was too high.  Well here we are this year and the teacher is already hinting at putting him on medication.  Not those exact words but I am not dumb.  He is always trying to get me to let him stay home, saying he hates school.  He has a lot of friends and does well on his work.  We just got some of the standardized testing scores home and he is basically in-between basic and advanced.   In math he is so close to being advanced; so what the heck!  We have started him on a vitamin regime and I am in close contact with his teacher.

Besides that things are picking up at work.  Which is good I was really starting to worry.

Here are a couple of crafting things I have done to stay sane along the way. 

A soldering class with my friend Raquel.  It was a fun technique to learn but will take a little more practice and a new higher powered soldering gun.  Oh my God when I typed that I heard the Tim the Tool Man Taylor grunting sound.   Yeah baby more power.

My Orange mixed media canvas

And some cards I made for a challenge at Stampington & Co.

I wasn't sure about the top picture at first but now I really like it.  She is the Goddess of Our Burning Desires.  The butterfly and image of the woman came from The Graphics Fairy.

These photos are from my camera phone that's why they look so washed out.

Hope all is well in your land

~

My mojo is actually on a roll for once.  This is a good thing and a bad thing.  I consider mojo as a state of mind where everything is clicking- good thing.  The bad thing is when my mind is clicking all over the place.  So much so that I can't t seem to finish the first thing that clicked, which leads to a pile of half clicked ideas.

But with everything in it's current clicking state I feel confident enough to post my creative biz to-do list.  I have even accomplished some items from previous lists.

I was amazed at how fast it actually took me to read the 240 page e-course by Kelly Rae Roberts.  Thank you Yvette for convincing me to sign up.  It has been the best workshop ever and has been paramount in me finally believing I can take my creative biz to another level.

I also finished up and posted my first tutorial you can find it here.


This Week my goals are:

1. Work on my magazine submissions
2. Post another item to Etsy
3. Fix up shop page, bio, and shipping
4. Work on blog features 
5. Creative Color Challenge- Yellow

Kiah and I have been having a hard time with each other lately.  We couldn't be more different personality wise.  I just can't seem to get through to him sometimes.  He acts like I am completely irrational when I ask him to do simple every day things.  "Why do I have to brush my teeth everyday!!!"  "Um, because."  You would think he would get it by now.  People probably  think that since I work from home I have all the time in the world to spend with him.  But it is quite the opposite.  So this week I also want to work on spending more one on one time with him. 

1. Go for a couple walks throughout the week. Or one at least for crying out loud.
2. Do at least one drawing activity
3. Do a science project
4. Play a board game

Don't get me wrong, we do lots of things together.  But it's hard for me to get him to even take a walk.  Somehow I have to make him think these are his ideas.  We'll see how it goes.  Hope you all have a good week!

 

  

  I absolutely adore this picture of Kiah.  I want to get it printed out huge on a canvas.  He looks so serene and peaceful.  We all went out to the Campbell perk ponds for the kids fishing day.  I even dragged my mom out there.  Kiah and Chris caught 4 fish, and were so proud of themselves.  Since they were freshly stocked we were able to eat them, which we can't usually do in San Jose.  I think Kiah enjoyed spending time with his dad.  He has been on his best behavior the last few days.  At first I thought it was because Halo Reach was coming out.  You can always tell when a new game is going to come out, 'cause Kiah will start being demonstrably good and whisper sweet nothings in my ear.  But no, Halo is not coming out till September- Thank God, and he is still being good.  Knock on wood.

  This weekend I also finished my poetry quote bag and journal.  I must have been disillusioned when I thought the tote bag was going to be easy.  Ha!  Maybe it was because I haven't sewn anything since I was a teenager and even then I didn't actually sew.  I just cut out the pattern, forgetting to cut out the darts, then cried to my grandma, "can you fix my mistake".  Besides the fact, that is was hard to make and almost had me breaking down in tears.  I love the way it came out.  It is too cute.  I haven't had the chance to take any photos of them yet, but will try to post tomorrow.

My brother came over on Sunday and fixed my photoshop.  I couldn't be more happy, I was getting so frustrated with it.  All he had to was uninstall and reinstall, I knew that would probably fix the problem, but I was scared I would mess it up even more if I started to screw with it. 

I found this picture while cleaning out my closet today.  It was probably taken in San Diego.  A couple of times when I was a child my dad took me down there to visit my grandma and grandpa.  I don't have a lot of childhood memories.  But I do remember some crazy times in San Diego......

1.)  Being chased down by a flock of geese.
2.)  Losing my favorite necklace in the sand... you know those ones from the 80's where you can link them together by pushing then into each other... it was a major tragedy back then.
3.)  Riding in the back of a taxi cab, when there wasn't any seatbelts.  The driver was driving so crazy and I kept flying everywhere as my dad was yelling profanities at the driver.
4.)  My grandma and grandpa lived on a boat and for some reason didn't have a toilet, so we had to use a bucket.  Another tragic event, I was so scared I was going to fall in.
5.)  Waking up alone on the boat while my dad and grandma went grocery shopping.  But we didn't want to wake you.   Yeah right
6.)  Picking up a bird because I didn't know it was dead.  My dad scared the hell out of me by smacking it out of my hand, spanking me, and yelling  "You're going to get diseases!" over and over again.  
7.)  Driving my grandma and grandpa's old toyota truck home to San Jose in the pouring rain with no wind shield wipers.  He was totally freaking out saying, "We're not going to make it" and I just kept saying, "it's going to be okay daddy."  and it was. 

That ride home made a major impact on my father's life.  After my parent's got a divorce when I was six, we saw each other on and off.  When I got pregnant at 19 he stopped talking to me and we would only see each other maybe once a year.  He would always tell me the story of us driving home in the rain.  My father passed away three years ago.  We had finally started talking only a couple of months before he passed.  While he was in the hospital I stayed there everyday telling him the same thing I told him on that ride home,  "it's going to be okay daddy".  Until it wasn't okay anymore.  I cherish every single memory I have with my father, as crazy as they are because they are all I have now.

Overload....

The last couple weeks has been an whirlwind. On Monday the 8th we had an appointment with Kiah's doctor. It was to discuss Kiah's difficulty focusing. The doctor showed me this chart with all these numbers and lines all over the place. I couldn't have been anymore confused. I could not understand it at all. From what the doctor says there is a high probability that he could have
ADD, but a low probability for psychological disorders......Okay. If anything he would have a very mild case of ADD. The Rx for that is less video games, discipline, and scheduling. Easy for them to say.

I took it really hard. What I heard was it's all up to me. If I thought it was going to get better; no, it's going to get harder. I don't know what I expected... some powerful magic disciplinarian words that would, all of a sudden, make him a good boy? Or some sort of miracle drug that would make him a perfect student with a zpd of 5.5-6.5. I ended the appointment by saying how happy I was that Kiah had not gotten sick in over a year. Wish I had wood to knock on cause a couple hours later he had a fever.

The next morning I broke down and practically started crying when I had to call in his absence. Kiah is very prone to fevers, he even gets them when he has allergies. His temperature was 99.3 but if your temperature is above 99.1 you can't come to school. Just thinking off spending an extra 6 hours with him almost sent me over the edge. I know that sounds mean and awful but sometimes I have to use everything in me to literally not run away.

Because he was sick on the 9th he missed his second grade performance "Peter Rabbit". I was upset about this too, which added to my near emotional breakdown. We were planning to leave almost an hour early so we could get good seats because last year were in the nosebleeds and could hardly make him out in the sea of 1st graders.

He ended up going to school Wednesday, staying home Thursday, and going to school Friday.

We have been trying to adhere to the doctor's orders of 1 hour of game and t.v. time. Surprisingly I think it has been helping. Kiah has been very well behaved and we have been able to spend time together having fun. Which is a lot better than screaming and hollering at each other.

Last Saturday we had Linsey's 26th birthday. I planned out a Woodland Tea Party theme. I started planning it a couple months ago. I would make all these decorations from recycled materials and take such good pictures of it someone would want to feature it their magazine. I know....high hopes. It all caught up with me too fast. I did manage to go to the Dollar Store and get a bunch of fake flowers, butterflies, and streamers. I also made some really awesome flowered headbands for all the girls. They turned out so cute and were super easy to make. At the Dollar Store the headbands were 4 for a dollar and I already had a ton of fake flowers. I just arranged different flowers petals together and held them together with a brad. Then glued them to the headband with E-600. I also bought a bunch of stuff at the last minute from Bake It Pretty. I could look at their site forever, they have have the cutest things. Party success good food, good company, good time. I wish I would have managed to snap a pick of my cool Dollar Store decorating. Talk about cheap and it did kinda look like a woodland wonderland.

On another note I couldn't be more shocked more than a 1,000 views on my Flicker. I feel like all these years of taking pictures and wasting money on cameras, and all that comes with it, has finally paid off. It really makes you feel good when you can wake up in the morning and see peoples comments and awards. It truly is amazing and for that, Kiah behaving, and being able to celebrate another one of my sister's birthdays, I am truly grateful.

Well, my Baby did it. He received his black belt. After 2 years of moaning and groaning every time he had to go I think I deserve a black belt or at least some sort of consolation prize. We are all so proud of him and he was so proud of himself. He got all choked up after Mr. Moore spoke so highly of his sparring skills. Now that he has his black belt we are going to take a break from karate. We are looking into something else for him to get into. I think kids Kiah's age need to be in at least one extra-curricular activity. That gives them less time to watch t.v. or play video games. As it is am I feeling so relaxed already knowing that our evenings will be a little freer (is that even a word). I think I will wait a few before I actively start pursuing another activity.

You're more than just what you do for others.....

I read somewhere that what stresses us out the most is that we don't take the time to do what we truly want to do. I am terribly guilty of that. Something in my human nature makes me always forget about me. I blame it mostly on pure exhaution. It is easier to just go along with what it is that makes everyone else happy, then to deal with their fits when you want to do the opposite. One of my resolutions for the new year was to make more time for me to do what I truly wanted. Time that I can use to rejuvenate my soul.

One thing that rejuvenates and inspires me is art. But most of the time I wish I could break free from thinking so much about how I should be doing something. I want to just get lost in the process of creating. Forget about it looking perfect.

Another thing that gets me going is learning new things. When I heard Marah Johnson from Creative Imaginations was teaching a class at Scrapbook Island, I knew it would be a perfect way for me to do my thing for a couple hours. I turned my phone off and got lost in my element. Marah is an excellent teacher. She was very easy to learn from and she made the class really fun. She taught really cool techniques for products like Glimmer Mist and Alcohol Inks. Plus tips on using up the supplies you already have. I took a pic with Marah but I hate how ir turned out. I look like a frumpy crazy lady. I tried to took make it look better by applying textures, but oh, well. Here goes to not trying to be perfect.

After taking this class and participating in Susan Tuttle's wokshop my ideas and mojo are definately flowing. And I am feeling rejuvenated enough to start this week in a good mood. I have a conference with Kiah's teacher tomorrow to see if he may need extra help such as rsp or tutoring.

Chris and I need to decide whether we want to pay the $500 deductibe to get out passenger/side door fixed. While we were at the library last Thrusday somebody smashed into our car and just left. The irony of it was Kiah wanted to go to the book store, but we told him we were going to the library because it would save us money. Kiah being his materialist self didn't like that idea but we held firm, no we were going to the library. Well maybe we should have listened to him, we would have saved $500 by going to the damn book store.

No vitamins for you......

I recently found out my family is too crazy to shop at Whole Foods. Last week I tried to make it there to get new vitamins. That idea was dashed when Kiah decided to throw a major fit inside of Game Crazy complete with a dramatic bloody nose (he gets those when he really works himself up). I couldn't mingle with the Los Gatos yuppies with Kiah all bloody. You would think that with all the bloody noses he has gotten he would remember to put his head back, not downward so it gushes all over his good clothes. But of course that would not have won him an Oscar.

I don't know what possessed me to try to go there again this weekend with Kiah and Granny. It all started out fine. We would eat first, then shop. It took us forever to get our order and we had to pay before we ate. So Chris goes off to get us a cart and I am walking backwards, my arms full of food trying to make sure Kiah and Granny were keeping up. At the same time I got to the checkout, Grandma got side tracked by the salad bar. I couldn't have lost sight of her for that long. But it was long enough for Chris to find her grabbing handfuls of kidney beans, sampling and making nummy noises. Yes, with lots of Los Gatos people looking on in disbelief. Chris comes up, "You can never take your eyes off of her!!" Me: "What are you talking about?" ...Okay, we won't be looking at vitamins this week either. We managed to sneak out of there without further embarrassment. When we scolded Granny all she could say was, "But I love those bally things!" Seriously, I am going to have to put her on one of those kiddie leashes next time.

I think I live in the Land of Loonies...

First off taking care of a Granny with dementia entails answering questions like, "will it be dark until it is light?", helping her when she gets stuck in public restroom stalls, having to deal with her when she gets angry when she doesn't have beer and chips, telling her I am her granddaughter every other day, listening to the same stories over and over again, and what not.

But what really worries me:


The other night started off okay. Kiah received a gift certificate to Baskin Robbins for graduating out of reading lab. He was happy to skip karate to go get ice cream. I was happy to skip karate and not have to sit in uncomfortable chairs listening to kids yell at the top of their lungs, yet, reluctant to go to ice cream - I mean come on - I just started a diet. I was proud of myself for picking the kid's size vanilla pomagranite probiotic frozen yogurt. So I figured why not go to Trader Joes to pick up some good healthy food to reward myself. Kiah was being his usual crazy self: squirreling around, hopping on the cart, all while holding his double scoop ice cream cone. I kept telling him to stop, and in what seemed like slow motion his ice cream flew up, somersaulted and landed face down in the cart. Of course he starts trippin'. After telling him told you so, I instructed him to take it out to the garbage and use the napkin to wipe the top of it off so he could eat the rest. He looked at me like, "What?" So I repeated my self again - "What?" So I slowly broke down the steps pointed everything out and figured he had it. Went and got the cart and came back. I started shopping and he asked, "Are you sure I can eat it?", "Yes". "Are you sure I can eat it?", " Yes, you wiped it off right? , okay then. " He takes a big bite then says, " I didn't know I can eat ice cream after wiping it on a garbage can." OH MY GOD!!! Now I am trippin'. Chris walks up and I start telling him and freaking out. I asked him, " Can you take him ... take him to get a drink of water." He looks at me like, "What." "Chris, can you take him to get a drink of water?" - "What?" By that time I was almost in shock by the absentmindedness of my boys -I mean what in the hell? Why would my son even think that I would say to wipe it off on the garbage and Chris, hello!, he ate garbage practically. He got his drink, I gave him my frozen yogurt and thanked God for probiotics.